Comments on: Late Night Theories

By: Sander Tams

Sander Tams — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 02:14:04 +0000

Taiwan is just so much more a traditional society, still with a lot of gender inequality. To me, people here just generally don’t seem know how to just calm down and be nice to each other in family relations. I think it’s some combination of unrealistic expectations of the men and discrimination towards women.
Socially, things are changing pretty rapidly here and there’s a bit of a gap between the 50+ year mothers and their 20-40 year old daughters whose lives and marriages that they’re still trying to control more or less.

Actually, it’s not just the young couples that shout at each others. It’s the older ones too – yeah, those that have been married for ages and already have grandchildren.

By: serena

serena — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 04:04:15 +0000

http://theadventurouswriter.com/blog/quipstipsachievinggoals/love-relationships/why-couples-break-up-types-of-relationship-problems/

2. imbalance of power
3. acceptance of stereotypes

the whole notion of “xiao nu ren” and “da nan ren” pisses me off

By: Tina

Tina — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 14:39:16 +0000

not all the boys, just the ones that Jen dated and some others too

By: minh

minh — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 12:45:22 +0000

Hi Tina…just recently picked up on your blog. I could really relate to this post. I am also an ABC who taught English in Taipei last year. Aside from the initial culture shock related to language, food, traffic, etc., I was rudely awakened by domestic disputes across the hall of my hotel room when I first arrived–and then when I moved to my apartment, both my neighborhoods on each side loved to have tearful shouting matches in the middle of the night. Unfortunately I don’t understand Taiwanese/Mandarin, but in all of these instances the women were always uber high pitched, repetitive, and often resulted to hitting or throwing things…while the men involved were calm and mumbled about 4 words to every 40 that were shouted. Another foreign teacher that I know also reported similar issues and we concluded that in general, abusive relationships are probably not all that different from the States–but it makes sense that we especially noticed it in a jam-packed city like Taipei, a city that is built with pretty thin walls. However, I agree with you that it seems that some of these women (I know, I’m generalizing a bit) are frustratingly fickle in that they just won’t leave these relationships that are causing them (and everyone within a 10 ft radius) so much anxiety. I don’t know what it is either. (btw this went on for 2-3 nights a week for all of 3 months before I finally decided to move out.)

By: Nino

Nino — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 01:13:34 +0000

Great post, Tina I had no idea about this being so common for you to observe. My Taiwanese girlfriend is totally the opposite of what you described. Lucky me You are so right what you say, why do these people stick together? Obviously it seems that the relationship doesn’t seem harmonious, I kinda hardly imagine two people loving each other and treating each other like that.